9 steps to effective goal mapping (or How to meet Oprah) 

About a month ago when we discussed upcoming blogs, I groaned out loud on the phone to Lesley when we discussed that I should write this blog. Goals–Lesley is the half of this pair that makes them, and is successful at achieving them. Continually. She gets so excited about goals and achieving them–check out her post about goals last year…I’m more of a dreamer than a goal maker. However, the next day I picked up on a podcast where I left off, and BOOM-I was super inspired. So here we go: Goals 2016.
I was listening to Lewis Howes’s podcast and he was answering questions from listeners.  Lewis was asked what his 5 year goals include. Although that podcast itself isn’t the focus, this question is. But here is the link if you want to check it out.  He started listing people he wanted to interview–and the first few he listed I was with him, oh yeah he could totally get THOSE guests (like I know his reach from listening to his podcast for a month) and then he listed Oprah and President Obama. In my head, I thought “oh yeah, that’s reaching too far. He’ll never get those.” I was getting ready for work and I literally froze in my tracks–waaaaayyyyiiiit. Why COULDN’T he get those guests? He’s a prominent figure in the personal growth world. He’s got a podcast and a best seller and a great overcoming adversity story. He should have goals that big.

Ok. So let’s switch gears for a moment and I’ll come back to this. At this moment Lesley and I are trying to figure out new goals for our LiveClareLesley empire, and so I’m taking in A LOT of content (books, blogs, podcasts) on making a better business, being a better person, better ways to attract a partner…so generically: how to be better. What a lot of the advice boils down to is:

1) Find your strengths.

2) Find your desires.

3) Aim higher than both.

The people spouting this info are always saying that is what they did, became more successful than their gigantic and once unattainable dream, and now people are looking to these souls who have reached their goals, listening to them repeat these instructions.

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Now, back to, my new personal growth crush: Lewis Howes, and his goal to get to interview Oprah or the President–I stopped in my tracks because I was pooh poohing a man who just published a book and is on the best seller list. WHY?!? Because, I realized two seconds later, I don’t trust that if I made the goal to interview Oprah from where I’m standing at this moment in my life, that I could interview her; which would make our Live ClareLesley empire explode! That woman is a current day Midas! But why should she talk to two gals in a startup self help realm? I was so wrong and judgmental on TWO levels.  I was judging someone else based on my fear to make a goal, I wrote about something similar on this blog.

The second bad judgment–the only real reason she wouldn’t do an interview with me is because it’s not my goal to get there. Let me say that again: the only REAL thing stopping me from talking to Oprah is that I haven’t taken the steps to get the opportunity to talk to her.

In the same phone convo where I shirked at writing about goals, Lesley said: if I want something, I’ll move heaven and hell to get it. If I’m not that interested, I will let it pass by.

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THAT IS SO TRUE! If we don’t REALLY want something, why is it a goal?  Maybe I could get the interview with Oprah, or maybe I don’t really want it. In other words, I’m either not aiming my goal to get me where I want to go, OR I don’t actually WANT that goal.
Another thought: at the end, or near end, of any theater project every theater friend asks me: so what’s your next project? It’s a general question we all ask each other. Even if the actor asked this question doesn’t have a show, we always have a plan: I’m going to get my headshots redone so I can hit the ground running in January; I’m taking a class starting next week; I’ve got 5 auditions next week…you get the picture. In other words, actors are always working to get more work, to achieve the bigger goal. Many of my friends dream of moving to Hollywood/NYC to make it big. We continue to strive towards this dream. I’m always planning.  Always looking for the NEXT.  So…..why don’t I do this in other areas of my life? Why don’t I have the goal to someday interview Oprah for Live ClareLesley?!? This blog, this empire is just as important–it’s a newer dream with a newer goal, but it’s just as important as my dream to be a Broadway star and win several awards, get asked to do a television show that will run 10 years and have re-runs that will fund my life, let me be bi-costal, travel, and choose how to live out my late 60s through the next 40 years. (Woah, that’s specific. You’re probably having a similar thought to this paragraph as I did to Lewis saying he wanted to interview Oprah. Yup. Brought it back around).

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Ok. So here’s the New Goal Idea (wellllll, it’s not new, and you’ve probably read something like this before, but reminders are always helpful–and maybe you’re in a better place to receive it now. If not, bookmark this page–you’ll think of it and want it later!) we are going to map out our goals backwards!! Go get a pen and paper. Yes. Paper and pen. I’ll wait.

Ok. Write out your answers. Here we go:

1) What is your big lifetime goal?

(For my example, I’m going to steal Lewis’s and say: I want to interview Oprah)

2) Why is that your goal?

(Uh, Oprah is amazing and everything she touches is gold. Oh and she is a role model and helps people–and I want to help people) Oprah is an influence and I have some great questions I would love to ask her, that I don’t think anyone else has asked.

–if you don’t have an answer for this question, or your answer is hard to come to: re-think question #1. It could be you have a different version of this goal, as in you want to meet a different celebrity like a Kardashian, or maybe you want to be a great influence in the world.

3) what is the last step in your goal? (Huh?!?) This is something that you can control but seems inflated. Maybe even untouchable. It’s ok, humor me.

Ok. Ummm the last step in my goal is to have a wide following (like 200,000 followers) and a published book on the best seller list, so I’m a heavy enough hitter to have Oprah know who I am, and her people will answer the phone when I call.

4) How do I get there? (Ugh! Why are my own questions SO hard?!?)

I need to write the book. I need to build up my empire so great that other people are sharing and helping me market/sell my name and ideas.

5) How do I get to my answer in #4?

(Whaaaaat?!? Is this a trick?)

I create a book idea that is sellable and get it to a publisher (or other options), and I establish and make a big name for myself.

6) How do I get to answer #5?

I brainstorm a book idea. Market my website.

7) How do I get to answer #6? I do research; Look at other books, figure out what audience I have, figure out what I want to say. I go look for marketing tips, books, strategies, people who are good at marketing and ask for help/advice.

8) How do I get to #7?

Get an audience by starting a blog/podcast/website/social media presence.

9) How do I get to #8?
…Ok. I think you get the generic idea. Keep digesting your “gigantic and scary and maybe even seemingly-unattainable” goal until you get to tangible solutions/or mini-goals that will start you up that ladder.

Now, please note, that I’d at any given step, if you had no solution, you might want to think what it is that you really want. OR if it’s an old goal and you’ve already tried the steps, walk away and get a new goal (either for a bit or for good)! No sense in driving yourself crazy for a goal you don’t really want anymore.

ALSO–if you find that your goals are more focused on others dreams or goals (as in: my mother always wanted to have a cooking show, so I’m going to be a chef because once I made amazing Mac and cheese and she’s always told me I should be a chef, even though cutting tomatoes is boring and fish heads terrify me. Um, yeah. No. Get a new goal. One that YOU want.)

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Take this paper you wrote your answers on and put it up somewhere you will look at it daily: next to the coffee pot, next to your bathroom mirror, tape it to your computer top or television! You need to look at your goals DAILY in order to remind/challenge/cheer you on to your penultimate goal. (Yes, for you anal retentives, or you feng shui types, feel free to rewrite or make a more attractive version of your goals. But–once you’ve achieved each step, cross it off or check it off or rewrite the sheet and put it ON TOP (don’t throw away the old sheet–you SHOULD be reminded of what you’ve achieved.) But DO change the look or location of the sheet so you don’t get used to seeing it, and start to ignore it. You can also revise as you go–if you find that other solutions might help you get to your goal in a better way.

Feel free to do this goal mapping for any goal. Dig deep into those big goals–anything is attainable, you just need to figure out how to get there.

So now go forth, dream big! (No one was ever hurt by dreaming big, only for not challenging themselves!!) Go answer the question: what’s next?

–Clare

If you have a comment scroll down past the tags below (or up, if you’re on the main page), or email us at liveclarelesley@gmail.com We LOVE your feedback!! Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for DAILY inspiration!

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Mistletoe-it and Make a Move!

Alright, I have a confession. I have actually never been kissed under mistletoe. Instead, I grew up selling our own mistletoe one holiday season after it took over a tree in our front yard and we had to cut it down. But, being the lemonade makers we are, that mistletoe became our way of making a little extra dough during a holiday season. (Who says money doesn’t grow on trees?)

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But, this blog post is actually not about my dead tree and my young entrepreneurial adventures. It is, in fact, all about you using what’s in front of you right now to make the move you have been desiring to make for 2015 and for some of you in 2014, 2013 and dare I say it a decade ago!

When ever the holiday season comes around I must watch the movies Scrooged with Bill Murray and Love Actually with Hugh Grant. Both have a mistletoe moments in them.  In Scrooged, a minor character–this unfortunate woman, is battered and bruised (literally check it out) and she takes the opportunity to grab mistletoe off a wall, hang it over a cuties head and straddle him and lay one right on his mouth.  Love Actually, there is a girl who is trying to persuade someone she shouldn’t be by telling him she’ll be waiting under the mistletoe.


 

Use what’s in front of you right now to make the move you have been desiring to make


Which leads me to you. End of the year is here but it doesn’t have to mean you go another holiday season alone. It doesn’t mean you tell someone Happy Holidays but really mean “All I want for Christmas is you!”  The Holidays are actually the most opportune time to lay it all out there. Tell them what you want (what you really really want). If it gets all weird no worries! The travel season, snow days and hoopla of the next couple weeks, crazy families and more will soon take over their memory of you being honest. Then you can blame it on the eggnog, the mistletoe or your mother who makes you all weird about being single during the holidays. Laugh it off and move on into 2016 a year where you know the answer to “does he/she want me back.”

Or, it can go freaking awesome! You could hang the mistletoe over their head and they kiss you right back. Yes, it can and probably will happen. You won’t know until you try.

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Plus, this holiday boldness can work in other areas not just dating. In fact, make this holiday season the year you make a snowman with a family member who drives you crazy. Maybe a sibling or cousin over stepped their bounds. Wore something without asking, spilled the beans and spoke for you when they shouldn’t have. Or, a co worker who you feel threw you under the bus at a meeting. Grab two peppermint lattes this week. One for you and one for them Give them some holiday cheer and let the snow cover up the dirt from the past. When spring comes it’ll all melt away.

The holidays are about spreading cheer and love. They are about giving smiles to strangers. The beauty about the end of the year is that you can use all the parties, the last minute small gifts, or even tree fungus (mistletoe) to put an end to something. Come January 1st wouldn’t it be great to know if your crush is crushing on you back, your family member knows that you love them, or your co-worker sees that you are a rockin’ person and they shouldn’t run a bus over you next time?


 

The beauty about the end of the year is that you can use all the parties, the last minute small gifts, or even tree fungus (mistletoe) to put an end to something


Our very own Clare has put herself out there twice now on holidays. It didn’t turn out to be, but she was able to walk away with her head held high, blame it on the nog and continue on with her friendships and happiness. If she hadn’t she might still be wondering two years later how they felt about her.

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I went door to door selling mistletoe one season. That mistletoe provided many, many people with lots of excuses to kiss, make up and love on!  So, readers grab that strength building eggnog, some mistletoe, press play on some Mariah Carey holiday music and make your move! Either way it’ll be a very happy holiday.

xx~LL

If you have a comment scroll down past the tags below (or up, if you’re on the main page), or email us at liveclarelesley@gmail.com We LOVE your feedback!! Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for DAILY inspiration!

 

Photo credits: Flikr Creative Commons: Tony Alter, R reeves, conniferconnifer,

5 Steps to Dreaming Big

We want to make our mark on the world in some individual way. Even more we want to be known.  We make friends. While engaging in relationships we find ourselves changing, or even worse, awaken one day to find we have changed into someone who has veered away from the path we thought ourselves originally on. Sometimes we like who we have become; who our relationships and experiences have made us. And sometimes we don’t.

At times these traits are obvious to us and at others they are not. When I first started this post, I realized that week that I’d become a pushover and a scaredy cat. (We often delay our blogs to protect the innocent–which is usually ourselves!) Anyway. At the time I was afraid to leave my job. For many ridiculous reasons that at the time seemed important and true. One: my life feels like a delicate balance and I don’t want to disrupt it. Two: my job was pretty easy and it paid me reasonably. Three: they know me. I’d been at the job for over three years. Four: they seemed willing to work with my crazy schedule.

All of these are bullshit. My life is a delicate balance, but living is about how you deal with obstacles while pursuing your passion. No job (or relationship, for that matter) is “easy” when you’re not being treated right–and sadly, I didn’t  feel like I was being treated well. Which leads to three–obviously they didn’t know me if they felt they could mistreat me. And my schedule isn’t so crazy and it’s not that I’m not accommodating when needed if possible.


Life is a delicate balance, but living is about how you deal with obstacles

while pursuing a passion.


Well, I woke up a week after writing the above. Went into work like a good worker bee, determined to keep my head down and keep working.  During my shift, I found out I was denied my request for time off to perform the show I was already cast in. I lost it. In what feels like the “Hulk smash” version of myself, I decided I didn’t need a job that told me I couldn’t put myself first, and I quit.

I hold myself in high esteem. I’m a calculated person and I very rarely make snap judgements, uninformed choices, or un-researched plans. For better or for worse, I rarely walk into a big decision without a plan. Quitting a job is just not something I do. This was a big decision, and I had talked myself out of it so many times, but when the thing I am most passionate about was put on the table, I didn’t think twice.


When the thing I am most passionate about was put on the table, I didn’t think twice.


Stephen Sondheim wrote the lyrics: “stop worrying where you’re going. If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ve gone. Just keep moving on.”  These lyrics always reassure me, no matter what I’m in the middle of. In other words, stop thinking about it and just go. Just make the choice. If you are that passionate about making the change happen, things will fall into place. If I hadn’t quit, I probably would have gotten let go, because I was going to do those performances. It was also time to leave that job. But I sat in it for too long because I didn’t value myself enough.

A while ago I wrote a blog on self-worth. This is a gigantic topic that we as a society don’t talk about enough. Therefore we question our worth, and what we want fights a battle against what we can offer. Which determines our worth.  If you continually think down on yourself, hold yourself back, or tell yourself that you’re not worth it, you never will be.


Maybe you continually beat yourself up because you don’t know how to do anything else. And if you pick on your own weaknesses, it won’t hurt as much when someone else does it.


I don’t know you. I don’t know your situation. I do know that I’ve been in both types of situations: the ones where I succumbed and stuck with something I didn’t want to do, and I’ve stuck up for myself and went my own way. Both choices have led to both good and bad outcomes. However, most times I’m  much happier standing up for myself, even though I might have to work harder, give up things, ask for help or money, and suffer a little.

How do you begin? Here is a place where lists will help you.

  1. Figure out why you dislike where you are–and “being you” doesn’t count. Is it because of hours you don’t like, not able to have a creative outlet?
  2. Can you change this by staying in your current situation but by just rearranging things?
  3. What is more important: comfort or creative? Heads up–pursuing the creative or the passion isn’t always easy. Generally it’s twice as tough because if you fail at even the smallest parts of your plan, it’s painful.
  4. Figure out your financials–this isn’t to say “don’t leap until you can afford to” but instead, “understand what downgrades and adjustments will need to be made, so it’s not so harsh a reality later.”
  5. Breathe deep and leap.

Just know that if you’re meant to do whatever your passion is, you’ll find the support. My gal Angie Atkinson is a huge example of this (outside of LL and I). Angie started her path to rock stardom three years ago, and isn’t famous yet, but you’ll hear about her soon. Angie started out wanting to move to NYC to be an actress.  That dream (and her amazing acting prowess) brought her to the city.  However, she decided it wasn’t the path for her anymore, and instead wanted to write and perform music.  She has been working on this in her spare time; writing, rehearsing; performing; and making an album–which she just released–go to iTunes or Amazon to buy it!!  For now check out a video or two.

Remember, whatever mark you want to make, you’re probably already on the path either to make it–just take a look around, what are you happiest doing?  What do you spend the most of your time doing?  Are they similar?  Why not?

We only get one life, so live it large.

Clare

If you have a comment scroll down past the tags below (or up, if you’re on the main page), or email us at liveclarelesley@gmail.com We LOVE your feedback!! Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for DAILY inspiration!

 

101 pieces of advice

We started out this blog, 99 posts ago (a whole year and a half ago), because we are told we give good advice and are always asked for it. Self-proclaimed, self-help junkies—we love and absorb ideas, knowledge and advice. We both love to expand the mind, quest for happy living, and search for analysis and reasoning in human behavior. Here are our 101 favorites from our blog, and from a few of our favorite bloggers (note that if you want to read more, just click the link at the end of each quote!):

  1. “OWN being in transition.”  Transitions
  2. “Help yourself out. Sort through all the issues in a simple and effective way: Make a list.”  Regain Control of your life- Make a list!
  3. “Things, life, kisses, don’t always happen the way you dream or plan.” First Kisses
  4. “Change needs to happen. Not all of it is drastic. Sometimes little change is good. It keeps you on your toes.” Patterns vs Change
  5. “You already know the answers.”  Breaking up was RIGHT to Do
  6. “It’s completely OK to know what you want but not want it now.” Don’t want it now
  7. “You really don’t need to keep things. Really.”  5 things I have learned from Moving
  8. It doesn’t matter where you lay your head, as long as you have a place to lay it.5 things I have learned from Moving
  9.  Be vulnerable. Take a breath. Ask for what you need. “ 5 things I have learned from Moving
  10. “… remember to breathe through the painful moments and just keep moving forward. If nothing else, you’ll figure it out as you go.” 5 things I have learned from Moving
  11. “Like any good relationship, a good friendship brings out the best in ourselves.  If you’re not seeing your best, you’re not in the right relationship anymore.” Growing out of Friends
  12. “Its time we make connecting in real life a trend again!”  Eye to Eye
  13. “Cut out the excess chatter and find that peace within.” Text-a-Bitch
  14. “It’s tough out there but don’t try giving advice that 1) wasn’t asked for 2) puts your friend in a place that makes her second guess herself 3) that isn’t leading to a positive feeling towards oneself.” No more projections please
  15. “‘No’ is a full sentence.” The Olsen Twins said that.  Basically…life’s too short to do anything you don’t want to do, or anything that makes you uncomfortable. You always have a choice.–Honestly Libby’s Blog
  16. “A flirt is really just a compliment of you being alive and in this spot at this moment.” Flirting: A How To Guide 16332829367_ddb088af60_k
  17. As cliché as it sounds, love will happen when you least expect it… The most important thing to do is make sure you are living a full life. Fill your days and nights with the things you love, your passions, your family, your friends. Don’t wait for love to happen.–This That and The Other Thang’s Blog
  18. “…. do it with bells on—figuratively that is.” Duty Dating
  19. “Statistics are like a bikini – what they show is interesting but the important stuff is covered up! In a world where we rely heavily on data, it’s people who are at the heart of what really matters and numbers can paint a very different picture, whether good or bad.”– Aloada Bobbins’s Blog
  20. “We all have our lists of wants and needs in a mate. If you don’t experience it in the flesh how do you know its something that is a deal maker or breaker.” Duty Dating
  21. Treat dating as a hobby. If you’re too busy with life, or not having fun, stop. Don’t stop your life, just do it in your spare time. First, dating should never be your number one priority.”  Duty Dating
  22. “Whatever happens, we are responsible for our own happiness and success.”– Lessons From My Daughter’s Blog
  23. “Truth sometimes hurts, but lies are ultimately more painful. Let’s stop lying to each other and make this a more truthful world.” Lying: is it really worth it?1438336432_0904c3f0be_o
  24. “..not every date will be someone you want to date again. It’s nice to set boundaries until the date becomes the partner.” Whats in a Name? 
  25. “Maybe you want to be distracted by a 6 out of 7, but 7’s and 7 Plusses do exist, and are out there for the finding.” Move On From a “No”
  26. “If you want it and are willing to work for it, you can make it happen!  “It” can be anything.”–Lessons From My Daughter’s Blog
  27. “The thing about callings is that once you’re called you have to answer!” Leap of Faith
  28. “Chances of winning the lottery are increased significantly by actually buying a ticket.”–Suzie Speaks’ Blog
  29. “If you want to buy fancy undies, or fancy wine, or have a fancy shave: do.” Am I an Amy
  30. “It’s wonderful if they call, it’s great if they take you out, but if you’re not being introduced to friends or other people in their lives after a month or so, there is a reason.” Professing
  31. “…forgiveness isn’t letting down the protection walls. Its more of the mental version of just releasing unneeded tension and relaxing your shoulders.”  How to Apologize to Yourself
  32. “Only tell others things that you wouldn’t mind the rest of the world knowing unless they have consistently proven that they are trustworthy.”–Suzie Speaks’ Blog
  33. “…acting like a queen means watching and kicking lots of jester’s to the curb but one day your king—do not settle for a prince!—will show up.” RESPECT
  34. “You can change anything in your present.  You can take steps to cure your own unhappiness.” Stick Your Neck Out
  35. “Sex one time or multiple times does not a mate make. If you’re having sex to land a mate…” The Best Sex
  36. “My advice for you is dream big.  Work that dream backwards until you have something “small” to work with.” Climbing the Career LadderSONY DSC
  37. “…moving and doing creates options.”  Round Peg Square Hole
  38. “…the excuse “he/she is not my type” is out the window. If you’re single and alone, its obvious your type hasn’t exactly gotten you a home run. So, try on a different pair of ‘jeans’.” Because He ASKED
  39. “If something makes you want to scream, it’s the absolute wrong answer. Step back. Put the item down.”  Holiday Sanity
  40. “Desire: the sexy Live ClareLesley way to prepare you for a positive path for your future! It’s the Fuck Yes way to set your “goals”. If you don’t desire the outcome, it’s a Fuck No!” Desire
  41. “Happiness is ALWAYS just a perspective.” Happiness
  42. “Sudden change of who you are shouldn’t happen just because the calendar changed, but instead because you want to become a better, upgraded version of your current self.”  New Year, Same You: Upgraded
  43. “Once you start sneaking in the time to create, you’ll start making time for yourself to create.” Competitive Progress
  44. “Get off that “woe is me” train! Grab you happy side up ticket and drink a glass of Self Love.” In Your Social Face
  45. Make your own damn plans.”  Valentines Survival
  46. “Shed those red flag preventing glasses and see your own wants, desires, happiness.”  Red Flags
  47. “Don’t make yourself smaller for a mistake.” Stop Saying I’m Sorry
  48. “ANYONE that you kiss, sleep with does NOT a Relationship make.” Sex with Friends
  49. “Remember, the right one isn’t “out there” but instead is inside of you.”  How to be Single
  50. “You’re exactly where you need to be right now. Isn’t that Amazing?” Climbing the Career Ladder
  51. “We decide when we want something to be done, and we arbitrarily pick dates and times and abilities that we think we should be able to do.” New Year: Same You. Upgraded
  52. “Remember, breathing is the opposite of nerves—if there is plenty of good warm breath in your stomach, there aren’t room for butterflies!”  Nerves: Squish Those Butterflies
  53. “You rest, you rust! Seriously. When I think about rust I remember this old wheelbarrow out in the back yard where I grew up. Do you really want to become and old wheelbarrow?”  Love the Skin You’re In
  54. “…dating should be fun. It should be treated as a hobby. No one freaks out about or overthinks yarn, book club, or collecting stamps.” Dating:  Straightforward From the Beginning
  55. “Texting does not a relationship make.” No Waiting Dating
  56. “Get your face out of your phone. Actually talk to people, see what happens.” Crying wolf on social media
  57. “Sometimes we set goals and then we grow out of them. Luckily we write goals on paper, not in stone.” How To Stop Avoiding Your Goals
  58. “How do you fight the distortion?  Fight it with truth. Get down to the nitty gritty. Get naked.  Find a full length mirror you trust, and take it all off.” Love Your Skin Now
  59. “It’s nice that someone is contacting you. Wallpaper is nice my friends; your relationship should not be just nice.”  Texting is not a relationship
  60. “If you don’t eventually demand your worth, people will think you’re worthless, or worse, take advantage of you.” What Is Your Worth?
  61. “Sometimes the dream we have had in our head since childhood isn’t the one we really want to achieve.” 5 questions to help you focus your dreams
  62. “You are a beautiful snowflake, and you travel however you want to.” Age–Does It Really Matter? 11445631923_df52846c49_o
  63. “Be ok with changing your timeline.” Are you in a trough of sorrow?
  64. “It is great to be altruistic, but you have to take care of yourself if you are going to be any good to anyone else.” Rest IS good for you
  65. “Just like a stockbroker doesn’t put all his money in one companies stock. Don’t out all your stock in dating online. Keep yourself available to meet people multiple ways.” 5 ways to change up your dating game
  66. “I will survive my crisis. You will survive yours.” How to survive your own personal hell
  67. “Your life shouldn’t be supporting your business; your business should be supporting your life.” 5 steps for getting out of your own way
  68. “Even if you walked the same path, at the same speed as another person, you would have a completely different experience. If you open up your eyes and have no expectations, you’ll have enjoyed the journey much more; you see more, experience more, gain more.” Age–Does It Really Matter?
  69. “Slowly progress into the schedule you need to hit the goals you have.” Love the Skin You’re In
  70. “What do you really want? Re-tailor your life to that dream!” 5 questions to help you focus your dreams
  71. “Go, picture the life you want to live, ignore the negative voices, try something new and have fun while doing it.” I Said Yes
  72. “Understand you are not on a timeline/time crunch/expiration.” 8 tips to survive your friends wedding announcements
  73. “Be careful what you say: your brain is listening.” Be careful the things you say: Your brain is listening
  74. “Love the person, leave the label off, and let your expectations and demands on a relationship fall away.” Labels are for Soup, Not People
  75. “You will not die from rejection.  The odds are better than any other form of gambling.” Just Ask Already
  76. “Build your business around your lifestyle not the lifestyle around your business.” 5 Steps to get out of your own way
  77. “You are never “too” anything… so stop thinking that way!!” Why the word “Too” is just an excuse
  78. “That is the first thing you have to understand and realize is that all “single” means is that you’re not in a pair.  It doesn’t mean that you’ll always be–unless you choose it.” How To Be Single
  79. Wouldn’t you rather be your own original story? Knockoffs and remakes are rarely as exciting as the original.” How to deal with a barrage of green grass 2680294816_e710a43d3b_b
  80. “Partners take time. Just like friendships take time. They deserve to take time. Like a fine wine, tea or beer…fermentation is a good thing.” Sex with Friends
  81. “Focus on yourself. In this time that you’re waiting, think about things to do for yourself, or that you need to accomplish.” 6 Ways to Stop Your Waiting Anxiety
  82. “Stay Hydrated. Drink in lots of self love, big picture thinking and how this storm will prepare you for the future.”  5 tips to beat the heat of life
  83. “Don’t value the actual money more than you value time.” What is your WORTH
  84. “Don’t create realities that aren’t really happening.” Make like a Blondie Song and Call Me
  85. “Breathing may be difficult, but you’re the only one who can control that. So it is up to you to keep breathing and keep moving on.”  How to Survive Your Own Personal Hell
  86. “You are in control of your life and your thoughts. Remember you have choices.”  5 tips to beat the heat of life
  87. “Maybe you’ll succeed. Maybe you’ll fail. No matter what you’ll try something new and you’ll learn something.” How writing a novel made me a better person
  88. “The thing is, you’re never alone in your crap.”  What to do when Shit Happens
  89. “Forget about “you only live once.” You only die once, and its getting closer every day.”  How to Face your Big Fears
  90. “Change it up! If freestyle isn’t working there are other strokes out there. The important thing is to take action. You’ll feel more in control of your situation.” Just Keep Swimming
  91. “Remember the beginning is always slow, but you have to just slog through it. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and you’ll get there eventually.”  How writing a novel made me a better person
  92. “Take a look around you. Say a general thank you to the positives in your life.”  The Power of Thank You
  93. “Let’s stop being virtual recluses!  Go forth and have conversation.” Make Like a Blondie Song and Call Me
  94. “Being yourself, having fun and making eye contact are all things that attract someone to you and your personality.” Could your next date be at the grocery store?
  95. “Sitting around complaining about it and doing nothing to change it seems pretty silly don’t you think?  Unless you do something to change your situation, nothing will change.”  How to Let It Go2512983749_ee38b41e0d_b
  96. “By creating a new schedule for yourself the bad stuff won’t seem so bad because you are living the lifestyle you desire.”  5 Steps to Getting Out of Your Own Way
  97. Make mistakes. Make choices. Take chances.How to Listen to Life Lessons
  98. “I understood that I would be even more unhappy and unfulfilled in my life, which would actually be worse than the possibility of failure and the humiliation.”  How to Face Your Big Fears
  99. Being kind only takes a moment of time, but it will earn you moments, hours, and years.–Clare
  100. The true definition of luck is when preparation meets opportunity. You can be the luckiest person in the world if you want to be.–LL
  101. Go out and be great.  Or at least enjoy the ride!–LCL

Thank you!  Here is to hundreds more blogs, stories, and pieces of advice!

xoxo–Clare and LL

If you have a comment scroll down past the tags below (or up, if you’re on the main page), or email us at liveclarelesley@gmail.com   We LOVE your feedback!!   Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for DAILY inspiration!

Photo credits–all photos from Flikr Creative Commons: 100 (by Ash); lightbulb (by Beat Kung); Create (by Dana Bateman); Truth (by T); Snowflakes (by MayYeo); Dream Big (by Heidi); Ant Heart (by uditha wickramanayaka)

Time and other Entrepreneurial words

As Clare and I have said many times before “everything happens for a reason,” and “everything happens when it’s supposed to.” This week’s blog is evidence of this.  My dearest friend Eric and also now one of my best friends is a killer Jewelry designer. His line is Hespera. A stunning jewelry line that he created himself. He started it out of his condo and now it’s in stores across the country.

If you are sitting at home working on your own thing: this is a must read. If you are sitting their thinking about what you wish you were doing instead of what you are: this is a must read. Here’s a little background.

Eric and I met through Raine my running buddy who was moving to Germany. She met an incredible man (now her husband) at the starting line of the LA marathon (proof you can meet anyone, anywhere, marathon or Grocery Store if you start talking). I was just called by Los Angeles magazine. I was awarded “Best Pilates” in Los Angeles for their “Best of the Best” issue. Eric’s Jewelry would be the perfect statement piece.

Upon meeting we of course hit it off right away, but we also found out I signed a lease just a few buildings from his place. In LA this is huge! As it is hard to stay friends let along grow a friendship and live even a mile away.

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After the fantastic party with LA magazine wearing the incredible Anacapri Eric and I started spending more time together. I had many years experience in sales, retail and specifically jewelry. He had a phenomenal line and I knew it was going to be something huge one day.

That’s why we are here. It is hard to know when that “one day” finally arrives. It is hard to know when you are the one in the thick of it, how far you have come.

The other day I was reminded by Facebook about a picture I posted two years ago. Hespera was at an art walk (his jewelry really is wearable art). It was the one bad weather day LA had that year. Wet and cold. It was outdoors so you can imagine. It would have been easy to get bummed out about the day. The lack of success. Instead, he took advantage of the beautiful display. Lots of pics posted. I posted mine. What do you know! Phone sales!

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After that show there were others. Success can have several different meanings. If you are focused on making money you are in the wrong business. Or at least in the business for the wrong reasons.

Eric understood that everything is a learning experience. He could see the benefit to all the decisions he was making. Remember when you are new you just need to get out there. Eric never stopped thinking of new ways to promote his wearable art.


 

Its hard to know when you’re in the thick of it, how far you have come. 


When you are doing your own thing you have to think out of the box and you have to be a little bit ballsy. He knew if people saw his work they would buy it, wear it and share it. He was able to get his pieces to people hoping they could get it to people. Trusting that his work would speak for itself once it was in the right hands. Trusting others hands to get it to the right hands.

Less than a year after the cold, wet show in LA Hespera made it to People Magazine cover with Elin Nordgren. YEP! Her first interview and right there, smack in the middle of Elin was the incredible work of Eric and Hespera.

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About a year after that Hespera has been growing. Steadily. The line has evolved because thats what you have to do. There is no growth with out change. Today Hespera’s shows go across the country. In two years Hespera is rocking. Does Eric have bigger goals for it? Of course! But, you have to remember my doers of dreams. Rome was not built in a day.

Each day, week and month you have to work on your thing. Talk about it! Shout it from the roof tops. Do not keep it a secret. You may be in need of a social media expert. Tell a friend or stranger. They may know someone who knows someone. You do not have to do it all by yourself. You just have to do it!

Dream big! Then break your dream into sizable chunks. Then create a to do list. Do it now, do it now, do it now! Trust me, it won’t stop calling at you. Once you finally do it you’ll be wondering why you waited so long.

Feel free to visit Eric or Hespera (and tell him that Live ClareLesley sent you) via the Hespera website or become friends on Facebook!

Lastly, some words of wisdom from the creator himself “style is all about wearing what you love and being confident.” I believe this is true for all entrepreneurs. Do what you love and be confident in what you are doing.

Xx~LL

If you have a comment scroll down past the tags below (or up, if you’re on the main page), or email us at liveclarelesley@gmail.com We LOVE your feedback!! Follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for DAILY inspiration!