Why are you constantly available? Cell phones. Laptops. Internet. All of these things make us continually available. Which is great, because anyone can reach us anywhere at any time. But. Anyone can reach us anywhere at any time.
I have a client who is tormented by her devices. She feels like people are upset with her if she doesn’t respond quickly to anything and every way people try to reach her. It’s almost like she’s a character in a horror movie, running from the unstoppable poltergeist–her words!
In a session she was complaining about how she felt like she didn’t have quiet time. And felt strung out because she was always answering to someone. A breath later she was commenting about how someone on the train to our session was on the phone and she couldn’t believe that they took a call on the train–and she felt annoyed by this. My response? I told her it was her choice and also her fault. Today we are allowed to connect with anyone and everyone and then he means possible. She has been complaining about how she is always there for her friends, coworkers, and boyfriend. Which sounds like to me is her choice.
The secret to not getting strung out; it’s not what you think. The secret: is to turn off your phone. Leave your computer in the other room. Schedule time for yourself. And do not let anyone else take that time. Whenever you take more time for yourself, you allow yourself needed rest to be able to deal with not only your life but everyone else’s.