How to NOT make Resolutions

So, I don’t make resolutions. If you read last year’s New Years blog, you know this about me already: I refuse. I will not buy into the hype. I will not go to the gym more, diet a certain way,  doing this or that just because its January 2016. You, Hallmark, Oprah, and others cannot make me.


However, I do use the roll over to a new year to take a look back at what I have been doing. Reflect on what I like, don’t like, need, don’t need, want and don’t want. I set goals based on my desires. Then I share these thoughts with Clare, my Husband and anyone else I feel needs to be in the know. Maybe it’ll even be you!

Last year my theme was to Love the Skin I’m In. I kicked that off with a 30 day yoga challenge. I did do 30 days of Yoga. I did go through the year enjoying who I am more. This goal for 2015 started because I caught myself not loving how I looked. Instead of berating myself, I took time to get into the present moment. What was I avoiding by berating myself. What tasks, to do’s or feelings was I avoiding by hating on myself?

Instead of wishing I were taller, thinner, tanner, or anything else outwardly physical: I moved. I moved my thoughts or my body or both at the same time! I stopped expecting things to just “happen.” Instead, I did things that would lead to what I wanted to happen.

Let me give you an example. As 2014 ended I really did not feel myself. I was just recovering from a broken leg that sidelined me for a month. No walking for a month. The body I was in didn’t feel like mine. I wasn’t super stoked. But as I mentioned in my 2015 start I did my yoga 30 days in a row. I also gave myself a challenge. A Pilates Education opportunity auditions only one time a year. I had 10 months to get stronger than before my injury. I made a commitment to do just that. I committed to at minimum 3 Pilates sessions a week. So, after my yoga challenge, I moved into a routine that I could keep up with regularly. When I felt my mind get upset about something I couldn’t do that I felt I should be able to do I made myself take a deep breath. Then I thought about it backwards. Much like I do goals. I looked at the problem: I can’t do ____. What would be the step below or before? What would be the step below that? What would come before that and so on and so on until I got to something I knew I could do. I worked my way backwards through the problem until I found something I could accomplish. Then I would follow this new map. You know what? It worked! 10 months into 2015 I found myself getting married and auditioning for 1 of 12 spots in the program I set out to audition for.


I left my audition knowing I did the best I could. I had the most amazing wedding and not once did I look at myself and wish anything looked differently.

I acheived my goals of 2015 and so much more and I didn’t have to resolve to do anything!  And I do believe all of this started with my goal to love myself, inside and out.


So, my dear reader how can you skip the resolutions and just win 2016? Think about what you wish you had, think about what you constantly complain about. For example, if you wish you had a new car then write down the new car, the cost and all the details. Then work backwards. What would you have to do to get yourself to be able to go to the lot? What would you have to do to get to the spot before the lot spot? Keep going backwards until you are at the present moment reading this post. Take your bullet point map and fill in any other sub bullet points if needed. Maybe you need to make more money? Or get a new job. Write in the steps to complete the major bullet point. It may take you more than 2016 it may take you less! Time doesn’t matter. It’s your desire, it can take as long as you want or need.

If you complain about something a lot like how you look, for example, or being single, or your job. Take that topic. Reverse it. Instead of I am tired of my job. Write My New Amazing Job is ____. Then just like you did above write the steps to go from point A (you today) to point Z (your amazing goal to___). Again, this isn’t always going to be a 12 month map. It could easily be 3 months or even 3 years.

My roadmap for 2016 actually goes way beyond 2016’s calendar in some areas. It’s shorter than the calendar in others. I desire to live life more fierce and fabulously. My roadmap and thoughts will filter through that. There will be detours. It’s the game of life. Detours are not always bad by the way. Nowhere in my 2015 goals did I write “get married” (I wasn’t even engaged) or quit salary and be my own boss. Both happened and both were awesome!!

Grab your feelings, your dreams and a piece of paper and pencil (it’s easier to erase as needed) and map it out! Maybe you could even meet Oprah!

Happy New Years and happy mapping! And stay tuned to this blog in the upcoming weeks (maybe even follow or subscribe so you don’t miss ANYTHING)–we’re going to have some fun posts and a big announcement soon!!

xx~LL

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Happy New Years–Our top 5 of 2014

YouTube message from Clare and LL (We’re real, and in NYC together!!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NSrzllk_3c&feature=youtu.be

Hope you survived your kiss at midnight.  If you didn’t, or if your main resolution is to make sure you have one next year, maybe you should get out there and see what you want and what you don’t!

Review LL’s tips on Duty Dating

Happy Hunting and welcome to 2015!

xoxo–LL and Clare

Best of Live ClareLesley 2014–New Years Eve Edition

Happy New Years Eve!  Go out and Live ClareLesley tonight, BE SAFE (and send us your stories tomorrow!) 

YouTube message from Clare and LL (We’re real and in NYC together!!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NSrzllk_3c&feature=youtu.be

We are posting our favorites of 2014 to celebrate the end of the old, and the beginning of the new year.  We adore all of you, our readers and look forward to Living ClareLesley with you in 2015!  BIG NEWS to come soon!  But until then, read and share and love and LIVE CLARELESLEY! Day 3 favorite: TaB: What do you do when you don’t know what to do?  Pause, breathe, and Text A Bitch!! And make sure to stop back next, and every Wednesday for new blog posts!  Better yet, follow us and we’ll let you know when we have a new one up!  Also follow us on Facebook or Twitter @liveclarelesley  Also, feel free to #liveclarelesley and share and post!! xoxo–LL and Clare

Best of 2014 Day Two!

Day Two!!  As this is the week of new years, we wanted to say goodbye to 2014–a great year because it was the launch of the Live ClareLesley movement!  We want to thank all of our followers and readers–you all are amazing!  We’re so glad you’ve decided to Live ClareLesley!

This week we wanted to revisit some of our FAVORITE posts.  Please read, re-read, and share!  Come back each day this week to see what’s next!

Day2 of the 2014 Picks: The Best S-E-X: Are you having it?  Read our tips and tricks–go into the new year with a new view of sex!

And make sure to stop back next, and every Wednesday for new blog posts!  Better yet, follow us and we’ll let you know when we have a new one up!  Also follow us on Facebook or Twitter @liveclarelesley  Also, feel free to #liveclarelesley and share and post!!

xoxo–LL and Clare

Our Top 5 of 2014

As this is the week of new years, we wanted to say goodbye to 2014–a great year because it was the launch of the Live ClareLesley movement!  We want to thank all of our followers and readers–you all are amazing!  We’re so glad you’ve decided to Live ClareLesley!

This week we wanted to revisit some of our FAVORITE posts.  Please read, re-read, and share!  Come back each day this week to see what’s next!

Day 1 of the 2014 Picks: Growing Out of Friends— maybe its time to clean out your friend list, as well as your closet!

And make sure to stop back next, and every Wednesday for new blog posts!  Better yet, follow us and we’ll let you know when we have a new one up!  Also follow us on Facebook or Twitter @liveclarelesley  Also, feel free to #liveclarelesley and share and post!!

xoxo–LL and Clare