Mistletoe-it and Make a Move!

Alright, I have a confession. I have actually never been kissed under mistletoe. Instead, I grew up selling our own mistletoe one holiday season after it took over a tree in our front yard and we had to cut it down. But, being the lemonade makers we are, that mistletoe became our way of making a little extra dough during a holiday season. (Who says money doesn’t grow on trees?)

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But, this blog post is actually not about my dead tree and my young entrepreneurial adventures. It is, in fact, all about you using what’s in front of you right now to make the move you have been desiring to make for 2015 and for some of you in 2014, 2013 and dare I say it a decade ago!

When ever the holiday season comes around I must watch the movies Scrooged with Bill Murray and Love Actually with Hugh Grant. Both have a mistletoe moments in them.  In Scrooged, a minor character–this unfortunate woman, is battered and bruised (literally check it out) and she takes the opportunity to grab mistletoe off a wall, hang it over a cuties head and straddle him and lay one right on his mouth.  Love Actually, there is a girl who is trying to persuade someone she shouldn’t be by telling him she’ll be waiting under the mistletoe.


 

Use what’s in front of you right now to make the move you have been desiring to make


Which leads me to you. End of the year is here but it doesn’t have to mean you go another holiday season alone. It doesn’t mean you tell someone Happy Holidays but really mean “All I want for Christmas is you!”  The Holidays are actually the most opportune time to lay it all out there. Tell them what you want (what you really really want). If it gets all weird no worries! The travel season, snow days and hoopla of the next couple weeks, crazy families and more will soon take over their memory of you being honest. Then you can blame it on the eggnog, the mistletoe or your mother who makes you all weird about being single during the holidays. Laugh it off and move on into 2016 a year where you know the answer to “does he/she want me back.”

Or, it can go freaking awesome! You could hang the mistletoe over their head and they kiss you right back. Yes, it can and probably will happen. You won’t know until you try.

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Plus, this holiday boldness can work in other areas not just dating. In fact, make this holiday season the year you make a snowman with a family member who drives you crazy. Maybe a sibling or cousin over stepped their bounds. Wore something without asking, spilled the beans and spoke for you when they shouldn’t have. Or, a co worker who you feel threw you under the bus at a meeting. Grab two peppermint lattes this week. One for you and one for them Give them some holiday cheer and let the snow cover up the dirt from the past. When spring comes it’ll all melt away.

The holidays are about spreading cheer and love. They are about giving smiles to strangers. The beauty about the end of the year is that you can use all the parties, the last minute small gifts, or even tree fungus (mistletoe) to put an end to something. Come January 1st wouldn’t it be great to know if your crush is crushing on you back, your family member knows that you love them, or your co-worker sees that you are a rockin’ person and they shouldn’t run a bus over you next time?


 

The beauty about the end of the year is that you can use all the parties, the last minute small gifts, or even tree fungus (mistletoe) to put an end to something


Our very own Clare has put herself out there twice now on holidays. It didn’t turn out to be, but she was able to walk away with her head held high, blame it on the nog and continue on with her friendships and happiness. If she hadn’t she might still be wondering two years later how they felt about her.

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I went door to door selling mistletoe one season. That mistletoe provided many, many people with lots of excuses to kiss, make up and love on!  So, readers grab that strength building eggnog, some mistletoe, press play on some Mariah Carey holiday music and make your move! Either way it’ll be a very happy holiday.

xx~LL

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Photo credits: Flikr Creative Commons: Tony Alter, R reeves, conniferconnifer,

Take a Leap of Faith

I have fallen into most jobs I’ve ever had. My first job was at a very cute coffee shop near my high school. My mother mentioned it seemed like a great place to work after visiting there. Less than two weeks after our visit, I was hired. I don’t even remember interviewing.  My second job, my classmate put my name in for her job at a doctor’s office when she moved to Arizona. Two weeks later, I was a junior in high school and I had a new job making more than I did at the cafe with weekends off.  In college, I turned in applications at an upscale mall. One of those applications, I handed in to Clare, and the next day I interviewed with the manager. The next Monday I was working for the same boutique as Clare. We became good friends and even business partners.

I stayed at that store from 2002-2007 moving up from cashier to store manager at my original store, and was later transferred to another location 50 miles away to manage that one.  I was good at my job, but it wasn’t fulfilling.  I needed a change of scenery. In hindsight, I needed to change careers. I had already discovered Pilates but wasn’t listening to the voice inside my head telling me “go this way.”  Instead, I tried to “fix” things by doing the same job with a different backdrop. Hello Patterns and Change. I still needed to learn something here.

I thought moving cities, locations, new friends a new life was what I needed. I also thought I was waiting for the next promotion to be a regional manager. I kept thinking that if maybe if I just waited a little longer…I’m sure you may know what I mean here. For years, I thought I was “next” in line. In fact, even other managers in the company thought this. It never really occurred to me if I wanted to be “next” or if I just liked the idea of it.

Think back, or maybe think now! Are you in a job that you wanted or that you just got because it was the next step? Jobs are often like relationships and can “happen” to us if we are not present with our own wants and needs. If we are not clear on our goals then someone else will get clear on their goals for us. This was the case for me. While I was “figuring” out my early twenties I wasn’t clear with myself on my goals and I began working very hard for someone else.

While waiting I decided to start training as a Pilates instructor. I thought I would do it as a hobby. Something to keep me busy. As I mentioned back in my Orange County life I had already discovered Pilates. I freaking LOVED it! As an ex athlete, Pilates made me feel like I was back in training again. But this time instead of training for a race I was preparing my body for my own life. I loved how strong it made me feel and I also enjoyed how no matter my mood walking in I always walked out focused, present and invigorated. But, when I moved to LA I struggled to find a teacher I could jive with like I had back in the OC or afford. I went to a training mostly for my own self learning. I knew enough about the body (I went to college originally to become an Athletic Trainer, the dream was to work for the San Diego Chargers) I figured I would just teach myself. A girl on a budget I could save a lot teaching myself.

The thing about callings is that once you’re called you have to answer! If you don’t it’s like a phone that doesn’t stop ringing. You can ignore it, even try to silence it but the call list still shows it’s trying to get a hold of you. Try not answering see where it gets you.

I couldn’t though. I answered it! Except, I tried to conference call—I tried to do both, manage a store and start my Pilates Teaching business. What happened? Well after a couple months of working 7 days a week some days 6am to 8 or 9pm! I needed to hang up the old landline. I just didn’t know how.  My transition from my manager job to full time Pilates extraordinaire was a big deal for me. Many around me tried to give advice. Tried to tell me I cared too much. To just put in my notice and move on with my life. The thing is, I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. I was still caring too much about someone else’ goals for me. I was still not fully engaging in my calling. I was on the phone, but I was also talking to the person next to me. Eventually, I was forced to get f’ing on my call and hang up the other. Callings are like that. They are demanding. Selfish. And they should be. It is your calling—what you’re meant to do with your life.

I wish I could say that those on my other call were still part of my journey. They are not. That’s ok, as we all know when someone doesn’t join us on our journey we can take it personally. We shouldn’t though. Now, on my own journey I have worked hard to support those who have to take their own path. In fact, I get excited even through them a party! Today I will encourage anyone who wants it to follow their bliss as soon as they can. Why? Because I took a little too long to admit that I didn’t want to just keep getting promoted. Of course new titles are exciting, more money in my pocket. But, what did any of that matter if I was following someone else’s dream and not my own?

I will never say it’s easy. Actually, it’s probably easier to ignore the call then it is to hang up and answer the new one. I knew what was on the old line. My store manager job was a salaried job with commission. I knew exactly what the minimum I was going to make each month. Security is a big deal. I knew I had health insurance and vacation time. Leaving that for my bliss too a huge leap if faith. Faith in myself and the Universe.

That leap was the best jump I’ve ever had. I’m still flying high 6 years later. The thing is when you start following your bliss, when you answer your calling. You’re rewarded!

How do you answer your call?

Well, turn off all the noise. Yep! Put the distractions away, the apps, gossip magazines, the reality TV shows, your email. Sit still, go for a run or swim, grab a notebook. It’s time to hear what you’ve probably been avoiding. Change is scary, leaps come with fears, what if’s, how’s and unknowns. All those distractions keep you busy avoiding that nagging voice telling you you’re meant for something bigger!

You know deep inside your heart what that is. What if you had zero obstacles keeping you from your calling. Forget money and time and anything or one that is putting doubt in your mind. Take a step in the direction of your dream. It’ll pay off!

As I said it’s not always easy. But wouldn’t it be the greatest to wake up and be excited about what you have on your calendar that day? Wouldn’t it be fantastic to have career love? To have Life/Work balance? (Yes, I wrote LIFE WORK balance.) wouldn’t it just be grand to live your dream, and not someone else’s? Leaving a consistent guaranteed paycheck for a “service job” where I’m paid only when I work was scary. I had and still have bills just like everyone else. I have student loans. I still had to make a certain amount. But, looking back and looking forward no regrets or worries interrupt my call. I am excited for what I know is coming ahead and for what I don’t.

LL